In my head I already knew I was going to come last in my heat at the Nationals when I was up against girls qualifying for Beijing not just from Australia but from countries such as New Zealand and Itally so I had set my own goals. 1. was not to fall in 2. to beat my last PB for 500m and 3. to beat Antonia! (she doesn't know the last one but she will now)
Before the race I was a nervous wreak which I think i had every right to be, imagine warming up with girls who where wearing their country's lycra and Ant and I in our Bristol all-in-ones! Plus being that nervous made me even more unstable than usual. When I came round to the start we had to back the K1's onto the start where a kid holds your boat until the starter beeper goes off. I was just thinking please give me a bloody rowing boat this is a stupid sport, why would anyone in their right mind want to do this. Actually why am I here? Then they called . . . starting in 10 seconds beeeeep. . . and I basically crawled off the start line while the Olympians raced ahead. I was so nervous my whole body was shaking. When I eventually finished, miles behind the others I nearly cried because I was so glad it was over. The pure humiliation of it all there was no way I had a PB and what was worse Antonia had beaten me ahhhhhhh.
We then did a K2 together where we fought all the way to the start line (very stressed at the thought of racing Olympians again) as we have rating issues then the race went better than my K1 but felt rushed and out of time. Anyway it's over and we don't have to do it again until Friday when we have the 200m. The say sport doesn't build character it reveals it. I certainly felt ripped raw to the core with that experience. I am so glad we have got tomorrow off, we are going surfing at Bondi where I can fall in as much as I like! Oh yes I didn't fall in!!!! (but think I held back for fear of falling in)
Also we got talking to a few of the officials and one of the old guys works in a School with my Grandma and the other invited us to Kayak at Windsor (Sydney) Canoe club who train at Penrith where we raced today so if nothing else comes of it apart from the great?? experience we might have opened a door of opportunity as we are thinking of coming back in September for a bit longer. Australia is the place for kayaking that's for sure!
This post sounds quite negative but I wouldn't have missed it for the world. Things can only get better!
4 comments:
My goodness my heart was pounding just reading this. So glad you did it, well done. You have both come a long way since August 2007.
Love from your Mum xx
Julia, I think it is time to tell you about the first time I entered the National Championships (No-one else knows this - well they will now!!). I was 16 and rowing J18 2x. In those days the Juniors that entered the Nat Champs were all in the Nat squad. Thankfully I didn't know that at the time - but that didn't stop me being extremely nervous. It was over 1500m and we were unfit and ill-prepared (again I didn't realise this at the time)! Anyway to cut a long story short I missed a stroke on the start, they shot off and we ended up being about a minute behind them when we finished. All sympathies to you both!! However, it didn't make me stop rowing - if anything it made me more determined not to let it happen again. Of course it did happen again (Brown University at Henley 2003 springs to mind - although by that time I did at least manage to reduce the deficit to about 20secs rather than 250m! Although some of that was probably them winding down!). But in between I had loads of great victories and experiences. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Go for it in the 200! Try and reduce that deficit!! I also think you are doing the right thing putting yourself up for these tests. You will improve in the 200 as you know what to expect now! I have a more inspirational story - should you wish to hear it but I think I have twittered enough for now!! xx
Best of luck in the next big race Jules - just go for it!
jx
Can't wait to hear how Friday 14th went. I have been willing you to do your best.
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